Let’s face it-we have all met incredibly great people in our lifetime or at least we thought so. They appear to have similar interests and characteristics that make them compatible with you. Their conversations are entertaining and pleasant. Your may be hesitant but can honestly admit that he or she may have some potential.
And then it happens: less calls, red flags, unexpected drama, uncovered deceit, character flaws and revelations. You may feel duped or a bit foolish and think “Damn, how could I have not seen this coming or haven’t I been here before?” The truth is you probably have been there before and you may find yourself there again.
But I would warn against becoming cynical and bitter about love and relationships or the opposite sex in general. WE all know that ALL THAT GLITTERS AINT GOLD, but sometimes (on rare occasions) it is 100% genuine. Thus, it is important to approach new relationships and friendships with an open mind. Sure- take from what you have learned in the past but do not make generalizations i.e. all men are dogs, all women are gold diggers. Give people a chance to show you who they are. Watch them, observe them, listen to what they say but judge them based on what they do. And when they finally show you who they are, believe them! It is easy to pretend that you are someone else but it is much harder to hide your true self. The latter will always win.
What you find in that person may be good, bad, or ugly but at least it is the truth. Take it or leave it. It is actually quite annoying but it is also a learning opportunity. No-he or she may not be the “one.” However, someone else will be. There are several variables that determine whether or not a relationship will be successful. You are also a factor in the equation. When you finally encounter that right person based on your definition, no one from the past will even matter. Those situations in the past will seem so trivial and insignificant.
Steer clear of being bitter. Instead, strive to become better at deciphering your needs and desires. This will give you a foundation to base your dating experiences on. You will then be able to see the bigger picture much more clearly.