Written June 17, 2012:
Ok…I admit it. I am guilty as charged. Well sort of. On more than one occasion I have been told that I think like a man. This was way before Steve Harvey’s book and film.
I believe that some people may get that perception because I am not rushing down the altar, waiting for someone to put a ring on it, or seeking a boyfriend, partner or mate.
Good men do exist. I know some and I admire them. However, my focus and priorities are not on a man or a relationship. I have the rest of my life to be a wife and a mother. I have no sense of urgency in that regard. And guess what? Thats ok! There is nothing wrong with me or any other woman who is content being single right now. It’s definitely by choice and I have the right to chose.
And while I look forward to a beautiful relationship and a few children, I believe that there is a time for everything. People have different timelines. My time isn’t now. Lol. I’m not thinking like a man. I’m making a personal decision.
Maybe I’m not the norm. But there are unwritten rules in our society that I’m constantly breaking. Ironically, I’ve encountered situations where the male was the one who was willing and ready to commit and I was not. The reasons vary but one reason is constant: I do not want to be in a relationship. Its that simple. I’m not afraid. I am not bitter or sour or any of the other assumptions some people may have when a woman feels this way.
It’s selfish to commit to someone just because you don’t want them with someone else. That’s not how I operate. I do what I want and I do what I feel is right. I am very upfront with men too. But I feel like I may need a sign that says “please proceed with caution.” I enjoy occasional dates and stimulating conversation but I can not offer anything else beyond friendship. I’m not taking applications either. I will know when it’s time.
It’s a gamble because it means that the good man now will likely find another good woman before you are ready. However, my spiritual beliefs tell me that what should be-will be.(Even if the good man right now doesn’t end up with me.)
And I know that what is mine is mine… Today, Tomorrow, or next week.
Sometimes it’s sucks because we may REALLY like a person. It reminds me of Ms. Badu’s song. Yeah-Maybe Next Lifetime